I wasn't going to get involved...

..but I'm having a really hard time just standing back and watching a fellow Sista get blasted so cruelly.

For those of you who don't know what's going on, let me fill you in. There are a couple of women, bloggers, FF members who are accusing a former blogger & FF member of fabricating her pregnancies, miscarriages, and medical struggles. I just have a few things to say.

First, these women do not have medical degrees to prove or disprove any of these things. One of them said that she googled ectopic pregnancy and found the exact same u/s picture that our Sista says is hers. Well, has anyone else noticed that most ultrasound pictures look alike?? You look in any ultrasound text book (and I have) under ectopic pregnancy, and yes, you will see similar pictures. And thank God for that, so that ultrasound techs and Radiologists can easily diagnose this. Her name, which was blacked out for privacy is in the same location as the name on the google picture. Ultrasound machines of the same brand will place the patient's identifying information in the same place. Just like every computer that runs Microsoft Windows will place the time in the lower right-hand corner.

Second, in the medical field, a diagnosis is not usually come by quickly and easily, especially when you're talking about a more complex diagnosis. An MD comes up with a handful of possible diagnoses upon first examining the patient. Then the patient goes through whatever testing is necessary to rule out diseases until the correct diagnosis is found. The doctor doesn't usually share this handful of diagnoses with the patient, because it would usually freak them out and send them into a panic. But when asked or when treating someone who is also in the medical field, they often disclose this information.

This Sista posted that the doctors think that she might have yada, yada, and yada. She did not say that she DID have yada, yada, and yada. I saw the posts. I was there. Her posts were taken out of context.

But what bothers me most of all is how these women are handling their suspicions. I believe that we all have the right to our own thoughts and opinions, but I wrongly assumed that as "grown-ups", these would be expressed in a mature way. Read here and here. CC's post reminds me of the way some girls acted in jr. high. Wolfette deleted her original post, but she seems to be enjoying gossiping about it all in her emails. Grow up, Ladies. I knew that girls could be cruel, but I expected more of women.

Edited to say: CC has edited her post, I see, in response to my post. I would call that backpeddling. She obviously sees that she is in the wrong here. It's ok. there are copied of her original post out there. And CC, post your pictures. I'll post pictures from my dh's ultrasound book. I'll bet they'll match, too. While I'm at it, I'll post pictures of twin pregnancies, and I bet they'll match your ultrasound pictures. If you're going to show the "truth," at least show the whole truth.

Many of us have endured pregnancy losses. Let us please respect each other. Miscarriage, infant loss, and infertility are difficult journeys to travel. Many of the people in our real world lives don't understand what we have gone/are going through. We have each other to lean on. Can't we just respect each other for who we are??

I know that there are Sistas that I hold in high regard that have read these blogs. Maybe you agree with them, maybe you don't. I don't care. I don't judge you because of your thoughts or feelings. I still love you. And I thank you for acting as the mature women that you are.

I just thought you should hear some other thoughts on the matter.