Update!

Ok, so here's the thing. Those of you who so kindly left comments yesterday predicting when this baby might arrive may all be wrong (well, except Mia, who wouldn't pin down a date!)

Yesterday afternoon, I had some light spotting. I called my doctor and he said that it was probably from my cervix effacing. Charm was moving a lot, and I was having Braxton Hicks contractions, so everything was normal. I was instructed to have a glass of wine and relax.

Overnight, I freaked out. I couldn't sleep, mostly because my brain was on overload. Also because Charm has now dropped so much that he/she is sitting right on my sciatic nerve when I lay down. So what was uncomfortable before is now pretty darn painful! Oh, and I had to pee at least every hour and I had menstrual type cramping all night. But mostly, I was freaked out.

This morning, my hot shower felt so good!! I really could have stayed there all day! The cramping continues, with occasional contractions (BH or not??), and diarrhea (sorry, TMI!). I've eaten, changed the sheets, and finished up the packing that I started yesterday.

We got more than 8 inches of snow yesterday and overnight, so dh took the only car that we have that is any good in bad weather. I don't really need to go anywhere, and I shouldn't be driving if I go into labor, but I hate feeling stuck here! I'm super grumpy, probably from lack of sleep, not feeling well, and yes, I'm still freaked out.

And then I feel guilty for feeling less than overjoyed about all of this. Don't get me wrong, if this is the beginning of labor or anything that will produce my baby, I'm thrilled! I just wish that I knew the game plan! Will this happen today? Tomorrow? Next week? Will I feel this uncomfortable the whole time? Will I get to sleep?

And I feel guilty for all of these thoughts. With as much as I've been through, as much as all of my sistas have been through, how can I be grumpy right now?? Right now, when Charm is closer to sleeping (or screaming!) in my arms than ever.

Then I freak out a little more...Holy Shit, could this really be the beginning??!!!!

So, I will continue to update you up until I leave for the hospital. After I leave for the hospital, check in on Crista's blog, Patience and Faith for updates...